Counsellor in Waterlooville

Ever heard of Relate? Long time ago they were called The Marriage Guidance Council and have been around since 1938.

Relate train their couple relationship counsellors using a specific form of couple counselling. They use a combination of a systemic approach and a psychodynamic approach.

Dean Richardson was trained not by Relate, but by a Relate counsellor and supervisor: Sue Esau ( accompanied by Chris Vincent, an independent, highly experienced and published couple psychotherapist and counsellor in his own right ) at Chichester Counselling Services in 2009.

Sue Esau wanted to extend and enhance the already effective kind of training that Relate offered. She did this via her own Diploma in Couple Counselling ~ which Dean was awarded in 2011 (final submission papers received Grades 1/1).

Systemic: helps the couple begin to understand what’s actually going on in their relationship. Such new knowledge gives the couple more choices in how they react, respond and work together.

Psychodynamic: helps the couple to understand unconscious processes and material that each partner may be bringing from their past into the relationship. Understanding of this can help the couple appreciate that some conflicts may not be the cause of their partner, but rather through a template (eg transference, projective identification, shared-anxiety).

But you and your partner don’t have to know any of this technical stuff ~ Dean Richardson uses plain English to help the relationship learn what’s going on, and to support the couple in deciding for themselves effective changes that can assist the relationship.

Brief/Focal psychodynamic counselling attempts to employ sound counselling principals, but in a much more concentrated and swift way. Both you and the counsellor must be motivated and willing to recognise and to sweep aside irrelevant conversation, in order to keep focussed on the problem. Such brief counselling often works hand in hand with setting a specific number of sessions at the beginning (sometimes called “time limited counselling”).

I realise how much balls it takes to walk into a counsellor’s room, sit down and start talking. For many men, the last thing they need after that is someone talking about feelings and relationships and making soft “hmm”‘ing sounds.

Which is why many men find Dean Richardson the bloke they want to talk with when they have some problems to work through.

In fact, for the majority of 2015, Dean’s client base was 100% male!

Need to talk to a professional mate down the pub? (well, not really down the pub, but you get the idea) – then come and talk with Dean Richardson

Whilst any counsellor nowadays will work with LGBT people (we’re not supposed to be prejudiced – but some counsellors still struggle due to religious or other reasons), Dean Richardson is a specialist LGBT counsellor (individual, couples and groups).

• A lesbian couple may feel comfortable knowing that they’re working with a gay couple counsellor.
• A gay man can feel comfortable that his counsellors understands his language without having to ask “describe what you mean when you use that phrase”.
• A polyamorous LGBT relationship group don’t need to feel shamed or awkward because their intimate relationships aren’t standard (according to other people at least!).

If you’re struggling with your sexuality, or difficulties due to your lifestyle, Dean Richardson could be the counsellor for you.

Dedicated website for LGBT Couples: http://LGBTCoupleCounselling.co.uk/

Not everyone is born, grows up, and naturally decides which way their sexuality swings. Some people struggle with desires and try to suppress them. A man desiring another man does not have to imply that the man is homosexual. There may be other things going on (such as a desire for intimacy; such a desire being displaced from its original-and-forgotten source). Working with Dean can help you understand your desires and bring about calm.

Dean works with polyamorous relationships. UP to 8 people can come to group counselling. The group is made up only of the members of the relationship (or a subgroup of the relationship) ~ outsiders aren’t allowed into the group. The group is facilitated by Dean, but he does not instruct the group on what to do. Instead, the group (including the facilitator) begins to form its own therapy to resolve the group’s problems.

Dean can use a Cognitive Behavioural Therapeutic approach where it’s helpful to the client.

Some people ask “Can I have CBT” – thinking that CBT is the same as counselling. CBT has a distinct use, but it isn’t the same as counselling and it’s not always the best approach for people in counselling.

For example, NHS CBT may be low-impact intervention, along the lines of “If you are feeling low, go out and do something that cheers you up”. Clearly, for a lot of people, that kind of low-impact CBT intervention is kinda obvious and not very helpful to some.

Dean is capable of integrating a CBT approach with psychodynamic counselling for a much more round, effective, whole treatment where appropriate.