Secular Marriage Counselling (non-religious relationships)Private Marriage Counsellor ~ Waterlooville. For when Religion plays no part in your Marital Affairs,
About Secular Marriage Counselling.
For when Religion plays No Part in your Marital Problems.
Whilst we might respect people’s needs for religious counselling (or spiritual guidance), for many of us in England we need marriage counselling from a competent, experienced, and non-religious marriage counsellor.
When non-religious/secular relationships need marital help, couples choose Marriage Counsellor Dean Richardson.
An effective therapeutic service that shows marriage-in-conflict how to develope their own, unique, approach will help them resolve marital problems… with no further need of counselling!
Secular Marriage Counselling Services.
Suitable for any adult marriage (straight, gay, lesbian, mixed). When the marriage is struggling and cannot seem to change the problems, marriage counselling will help you both identify what’s getting in the way of you working it problems out together without further need of counselling.
Your marriage is not limited by a set number of weeks (or years!), so marriage counselling works to deliver just enough sessions. We begin by clearly identifying what the marriage needs to focus on. Then ~ if you choose ~ you both can either work on the focus together with no further counselling sessions. Or, you can work with Dean until you can work on the focus together alone.
The counselling process does not prescribe therapy based on religious beliefs (“a good Catholic marriage means you have to a… b… c…”). Instead, the counsellor employes secular and proven therapeutic methods to help you both begin to resolve your problems again… together.
No need to wait. Very often Dean is able to meet with you for a first session within a week of making contact. Unlike Charities offering marriage counselling, Dean does not employ a long waiting list and as a private counsellor he often has sessions available straight away.
A Secular Approach to Marriage Counselling.
Dean Richardson MNCS(Accredited Registrant) is a fully qualified and experienced marriage counsellor.
He employs effective approaches that have been around since the 1970s.
His counselling service includes two main therapeutic approaches for marriages:-
- Systemic (Family/Milan Associates) – an approach that sees relationships as a system (think: computer, or washing machine). A system has processes (behaviours that make us love our partner), and triggers (things that kick off an argument). By discovering what a marital system the couple has (unknowingly) created together, the couple and Dean can begin making changes that affect and improve the whole marriage,
- Psychodynamic – an approach that recognises unconscious processes. Such processes might be past experiences being replayed in the marriage (eg early childhood abuse), or poor parental relationships. Transference is a phenomenon where we respond to a person as if they were someone from our past. This can leave the other person confused and not understanding what role he/she has found themselves in. Whilst these experiences can introduce poor experiences into the marriage, by working together the couple and Dean can discover how to resolve the conflicts and… finally… put them to rest.
These two extraordinarily powerful approaches involve no religion at all.
What about Religious Marriages?
Everyone’s beliefs are welcome within systemic/psychodynamic marriage counselling, and this includes religious beliefs.
It’s simply that this effective therapeutic model is not religious in anyway, and so does not impose beliefs on the couple (beliefs that one or both partners may not invest any credence in).
When you both are struggling in your marriage, you can work things through without worrying about religious beliefs with Dean Richardson MNCS(Accredited Registrant) – the secular counsellor.
A Distinct Approach to Marriage Counselling.
- Dean's primary client is the couple's relationship (not the two individuals in the relationship). Inexperienced counsellors - or those untrained in relationship work - miss this important aspect when trying to work with a couple.
- Dean's primary aim is to become redundant: the couple can end their counselling work without thinking that they've become dependant on a counsellor; nor feeling they will have to come back for 'top up' sessions in the future.
- The couple stay only for as long as it's helping: meaning they might come to counselling for just a handful of sessions, or may choose to stay longer, until the couple can work on their relationship's needs on their own (again). Dean does not set a compulsory minimum (or maximum) period.
- The couple work with just the one therapist: and Dean practices "neutrality" which means both members of the couple will be understood by a single therapist (no risk of multiple interpretations by multiple therapists in the room). Plus… the common factors that are underlying the couple's relationship problems can be understood and communicated back to them by a single couple counsellor as a single, consistent, understandable whole.
- Dean does not solve the couple's current relationship problems. Dean is not a "Relationship Expert", doesn't promote his services as being so, and doesn't claim to have solutions and answers for the couple. Instead, Dean focuses on assisting the couple to learn and understand their own problems so that they can address and resolve matters using their own solutions.
- The couple develop their own unique approach that can be helpful for years to come. Looking at the relationship's problems as if they are a symptom of a system that has become faulty (say, like a washing machine that works until it comes time to rinse). Understanding… and then amending… the relationship's behavioural-system can help the couple understand what's at the centre of their problems. With understanding, the couple can learn to manage & resolve not only current problems… but future ones too… for themselves.
- Dean involves & immerses the couple in the counselling, rather than operating as a pseudo-advice-giving consultant with-all-the-answers.
- Dean's couple counselling approach integrates effective systemic and psychodynamic approaches. Rather than using whatever is the latest fad in therapy, Dean successfully applies methods that have been tried and tested for a long time (30+ years: systemic, 100+ years: psychodynamic). This helps the couple (through curiosity, hypothesising & modelling) learn what's happening in their relationship and then helps them develop their own 'fault' resolving strategies.
- Unlike some couple therapists who respond to questions with 'answers' (whether such generic answers can actually apply to the couple's specific relationship), Dean empowers the couple into being able to answer their own questions by understanding & resolving their own relationship-conflicts. This helps the couple become independent of the counsellor.
- Boundaries are important: the session is contained within 50 (or 90, optional) minutes, weekly, in a safe room, with the same counsellor. For example, the couple always knows that they can open up (difficult) topics but not fear getting swept up into long arguments… because the session's end time is set.
- Future "top-up" sessions become unnecessary: the couple ends counselling when they don't need the counsellor any longer. Dean doesn't "fix" the relationship for the couple, he assists the couple in learning how to fix their own relationship problems together. Added bonus: the couple uses the same techniques to manage future difficulties. Once the couple feel that they are more capable at addressing their relationship problems together, they can begin to bring couple counselling to a close without having to come back for "top-up" sessions (as if they'd somehow run out!).
About Counsellor Dean Richardson MNCS(Accredited Registrant)
You could choose any counsellor.
But… when you consider that this is probably the most personal and the most vulnerable that you're going to be with someone, you'd choose someone you'd trust, who demonstrated adept professional skills, who spoke plain English (who's happy to use as much swearing/plain language as you use yourself), and who works in partnership with his clients (he doesn't sit in silence, or just says "Hmm" for 50 minutes)…
…then you'd choose to meet with Dean Richardson.
Seems a simple choice, really.
Marriage Counselling Costs
Marriage CounsellingCounselling for a Relationship
- Suitable for individuals
- Suitable for marriages
- Suitable for groups
- Payable weekly
- Available in Waterlooville
- Available online video
- 50 minute session
- 90 minute session(£100)
About Dean’s Counselling Fees
Private counselling will cost you some money.
Marriage counselling sessions last for 50 minutes per weekly session, 90 minute weekly sessions are available if we think this would help, but these are optional.
The fee is per couple, per session and fees are payable on the day of our session.
You may pay for your session fees online (eg bank transfer, credit/debit card payment) or in person (cash, cheque [made out to Dean Richardson], credit/debit card).
In some circumstances, my fees may be negotiable if your income were to make private marriage counselling a struggle to afford, but this is on a case-by-case basis and I may not have any low-fees spaces available. Please ask…
Once an appointment has been taken up by someone, that day & time stays allocated until the counselling work is completed.
Sessions are weekly, usually on the same day & time each week and are of 50 minutes. Available appointments are as follows:-
NOTICE: Due to the sitation regarding the Coronavirus, I have suspended all face-to-face counselling sessions for the foreseeable future.
I am currently preparing to reintroduce my Skype Video-based Counselling Service (which I originally designed in the 2000s / basically I'm dotting the i's, crossing the t's now). Details of this will be available shortly.
Option 1: Skype/Video Counselling.
If you would like to begin counselling via Skype Video (within the next couple of weeks), please get in contact noting my current availability (below). I'll be in touch when I have appropriate procedures and advice in place.
Option 2: Face-to-Face Counselling.
If you would like to begin counselling face-to-face when the Government advises us that it has become safe for us to do so (current estimate: May 2020), please get in contact noting my current availability (below). I'll be in touch when I begin to resume my office practice.
- Mondays: 7pm or 8pm.
- Wednesdays: afternoons possibly, but not yet confirmed.
- Thursdays: 5pm or 6pm.
- Tuesdays, Fridays & Weekends: not available.
Got a Question? Don't Hold Back…
If you have a question about Dean Richardson's counselling services in Waterlooville, or just want to ask a question, maybe about making your first appointment, feel free to drop Dean a message any time…
- 1 Secular Marriage Counselling (non-religious relationships)
- 1.1 About Secular Marriage Counselling.
- 1.2 Secular Marriage Counselling Services.
- 1.3 A Secular Approach to Marriage Counselling.
- 1.4 What about Religious Marriages?
- 1.5 A Distinct Approach to Marriage Counselling.
- 1.6 About Counsellor Dean Richardson MNCS(Accredited Registrant)
- 1.7 Marriage Counselling Costs
- 1.8 Marriage Counselling
- 1.9 Counselling Appointments.
- 1.10 Got a Question? Don't Hold Back…